A Machiavellian Wizard Lecture

Release 1.0

This modest proposal is intended as a further expansion of the section of the MUSH manual called "The Fundamental Laws of Wizarding" and Amberyl's wizard lecture document, aimed primarily at MUSH administrators. The following has been amended to incorporate actual practice.

Administrators may wield power, but they are not invulnerable. Fortunately, lawsuits to date have not been a major threat. Nevertheless, this document attempts to describe a practical and realistic code of behavior that administrators can follow while maintaining their position effectively.

Since administrators' actions reflect upon the entire MUD as a whole, and not just themselves, the most important thing is to not get caught or be seen as unethical. In practice, administrators still shall do as they please. Below is some advice which will assist in meeting all these goals.

1. Players are paranoid about their privacy. A good MUSH administrator should alter @sweep and any such reporting tools to be silent about reporting DARK wizards, so as to remain hidden. Similarly, avoid telling another about what you find when invading others' privacy. Loose lips sink ships. One must strive to maintain the illusion of respecting privacy. Finally, never post or mail logs.
2. Do not use @teleport frivolously. Players chafe when you demonstrate capabilities they do not have nor can they defend against. Similarly, a JUMP_OK place is not necessarily a public area. One must not be perceived as a clueless admin. Feign courtesy if you must. Or @set yourself DARK.
3. Never use stolen code in a place where the original author may find out about it, lest the original author raise a fuss. If you can improve the code and make it thus unrecognizable, so much the better. To allay suspicions that you may be hoarding code, have a small stock of code you can freely give away.
4. Do not reveal sitenames to non-administrators unless you can ensure they will not involve you as an accomplice in a personal vendetta, or reveal they have privileged access. Their needs do not serve you.
5. Do not alter other peoples' objects without permission unless the persons involved are generally unpopular. Popular support from the player base is more important than a few troublesome players. There will always be a few disgruntled invidivials to be dealt with.
6. Do not coerce a player object without the player's consent. Make backups if you must temporarily change something. Players do not forgive easily, and their memories are long. Besides, they have big mouths.
7. Avoid untimely use of @find, @search, and any other performance reducing commands; lock them out from players if need be. The last thing your site needs is a reputation for being badly lagged. Similarly, keep the number of objects and attributes on objects in any parent rooms and objects to a minimum.
8. Wizard-only commands must be made secure from intrusion. Aside from the issue of reputation, security is necessary to avoid sabotage. If you can't trust your underlings, dispose of them. Do not trust mortals with wizard powers, as the other players will hold you responsible for their mistakes. Soft-coded administration commands are highly vulnerable. Remember that this fact cuts both ways when exploring competitors MUDs.
9. Do not spam players with unnecessary @shouts. Players are a short-tempered, ungrateful lot and do not tolerate spam. If you are in an ill mood, go DARK and hide.
10. Learn to code for and maintain your MUD site competently, lest you be considered clueless or a player sneak some abusive code past you. If you can't do it, find someone trustworthy who can. Besides, being unable to maintain your server will leave you the laughingstock of other competing administrators.
11. Never wizard while being intoxicated or act rashly when you are enraged. It is unbecoming to a ruler to be seen as a bumbling idiot or a malicious fool. Instead, put off annoyances indefinitely until you want to deal with them. Players do not easily forget a short-tempered wizard. Always try to maintain a position where the annoyance is perceived by others to be at fault. Feign politeness if you must. An alternative is to have a spurious wizard character which you log into solely to abuse players; occasionally "discipline" your wayward wizards to maintain the illusion. Players who are considered an annoyance by the majority of other players may sometimes be dealt with out of hand, however.
12. Be lenient the first time with rules-breakers. One must maintain the facade of fairness. Ignoring annoying players sometimes works. Alternately, find someone else with more patience to foist this task upon. Feel free to draft a confidential blacklist of troublesome players and pass it along to other administrators. Of course, a person need only have allegedly violated rules in order to get on the list. It's a lovely tool for character assassination if used judiciously.
13. When seeking out potential wizards, ensure that you can deal with them effectively in case of disputes. Dealing with players is troublesome enough without having to deal with rebellious staff. Be sure of their loyalty. If you do not actually have access to the machine the MUSH is hosted on, it is possible for the database to be usurped if the system administrator conspires with wizards who are ill-disposed towards you.
14. In times of conflict, make logs to better defend your actions. In some circumstances, even a doctored log is better than no defense at all. Putting players on a warning list or a blacklist may be necessary. Feel free to spread rumors and half-truths so long as they can be plausibly backed-up. Remember, perception is not reality.

These guidelines are here to make the task of wizarding simpler for you. They exist to provide at least the illusion of ethical behavior; in general, if you follow these guidelines, players will find it quite difficult to accuse you of abusing your wizpowers and be able to back it up. They thus work for your protection, albeit not the players'. Players, often suffering from self-esteem problems, frequently take wizard mistakes personally and seriously, and often carry grudges as well as lumping all wizards in the same category. Players who are paranoid tend to be more difficult to deal with; thus, for the sake of your sanity and that of every other wizard who ever has to deal with that player, try to appear faultless. If you consistently have personal problems with a player, you should also avoid wizard dealings with that player; have another wizard handle the situation instead. Or if they are someone whom you can @destroy without consequence, so be it.

In all things, use common sense, and try to appear calm and impartial. When all else fails, log off or shut down the site to prove to the MUSHing serfs who's really in charge.

Oh, and have a nice day.

Jim W. Lai